AC: Paddy Morgan, you rarely grant interviews these days. Thank you for agreeing to talk to me. 
PM: I don’t do them because they get me into trouble. 

AC: You are known for saying controversial things, that’s true… 
PM: I have two problems with interviews. One, I’m usually drunk and when I’m drunk I have no filter. I say the first thing that comes into my head. 

AC: What’s the second problem? 
PM: The journalists will insist on writing down every word I say and publishing it. It causes me no end of problems. Not that I can usually remember what I said because I’m usually half drunk. I may have mentioned that. I can’t remember. 

AC: As long as you aren’t half drunk today! 
PM: No. I’m not half drunk. 

AC: That’s a relief. 
PM: I’m stupendously drunk. I suggest we get a move on. I may pass out at any moment. That, or start singing Irish drinking songs at full volume. It’s normally one or the other. 

AC: You got your first big break in the Hammer film, “Snog of the Vampire”… 
PM: It was supposed to be called Song of the Vampire but there was a cock up with the posters. By the time anyone realised, it was too late. I think they thought using the word “snog” made it sound more racy or something. I do remember I punched the director… 

AC: That’s happened a lot during your career hasn’t it? 
PM: That’s because they keep telling me what to do! I’m the bloody actor! Just let me bloody act! I have a problem dealing with authority figures. 

AC: Michael Winner described you as “unpredictable and undirectable”, didn’t he? 
PM: Michael didn’t like me. That may be because I answered him back. It may be because I once put him in a headlock, I’m not sure. 

AC: Do you think that as your reputation got worse, the quality of the films you were offered suffered too? 
PM: I undoubtedly made some terrible films purely for the money, “Bastard Bloody Mercenaries in Bastard Bloody Africa” springs to mind… 

AC: That was during the period when British films started putting in unnecessary swearing in an attempt to get an A certificate wasn’t it? 
PM: Yes. It’s a rotten film. I had to sign an agreement to stay sober for the duration of the shoot. I fulfilled my contractual obligations and then drank three African villages dry. It was around this time that my first liver gave up the ghost. 

AC: You’re actually on your third transplanted liver now aren’t you? 
PM: I regard my liver like I regard the exhaust pipe on my car, when it wears out, I replace it. Indeed, I’ve blown a hole in my exhaust pipe and my liver on several occasions.

AC: You’ve worked at various times with Oliver Reed, Richard Harris and Peter O’Toole. In fact you were collectively known as the hell-raisers… 
PM: It’s true that when we got together you didn’t know if you would end up in a bar, a brothel or a prison cell. In fact, I regarded the night as a failure if I didn’t manage at least two out of the three. I remember O’Toole once made a bet he could drink me under the table… 

AC: And could he? 
PM: No. Because I took a chainsaw and cut the legs off the damned thing! That was the last wager he made with me! 

AC: Returning to film for a moment, as you look back on your career, what picture do you think you’ve made that sums it up the best? 
PM: None of them. My career is best summed up by the cocktail I invented, one part gin, one part vodka, one part tequila, one part vermouth, one part Castrol GTX and a drop of tonic water. I call it the Paddywhack. It can also be used to disinfect wounds and to de-grease an engine. Cheers! 

AC: Paddy Morgan, thank you.